Awake And Alive

A Bounty Hunt Story

This story was also inspired by a song—listen to it here. I have been chewing on this story for a long time and finally had a break through—enough of one to crank it out. I hope it hits the right notes.

You can read the original Bounty Hunt story as well, here.

I am always open to feedback, so if you read this and you find something that must ABSOLUTELY be corrected or improved—please let me know! I am trying to improve my craft, same as you!

Thank you very much for reading, and please enjoy!

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Can robots be afraid?

I began receiving sensory inputs while I was lying down on a platform/table. There were humans frantically moving around me. They looked…small. I stared at my manipulators. They weren’t quite hands: they had a central grasping manifold and two stabilizing clamps on either side—a human might describe these as thumbs but that’s not really what they are. They are clamps.

I am designed to look like people, but I am not people. Am I designed to simulate fear, without being afraid?

The humans were shouting things as I looked at my hands. I don’t want to be in here. I swung my bipedal locomotors off the platform/table and the humans scurried out of the way again. They were trying to attach something to my head. Even just sitting on the table, with my feet on the floor, I towered above them. The tallest of them came up only midway to my central chassis. A human was climbing up on the table behind me to connect some cable to my head, I turned and pushed him away—he flew across the room and hit the far wall. I stood up and looked down at these humans, scurrying frantically around me. They had ropes and cables and plugs. I saw the door—I tried to step towards it but three of them stood in the way. I grabbed one of them by the head with my—let’s call them hands—and tossed him aside. The others fled.

I didn’t want to hurt them. But I also don’t know the structural tolerances of human bones. I push the door and it folds flat. Lights start flashing. More humans scurry about. There’s a kind of hallway here. There’s doors on one end, so I move towards those doors. Humans in different coverings emerge. They are holding guns, and wearing matching grey-green coverings. They shout things at me too. I just want to leave. I might have said that to them. They shoot bullets at me. One of them has a laser gun. These do not appear to be dramatically harmful—though the bullets have left marks in my chassis.

Should robots be afraid?

I was going to have to pass through these humans. I was not responding the way they hoped I would. I marched determinedly towards them. They scattered, they shot at my back once I had passed. I didn’t want to hurt them, and they were not hurting me. I push this door off it’s hinges and it falls flat too.

More doors. More people chasing and hooting and hollering. More flashing lights. Eventually I emerge. Somehow, I know the name of this place. This is a town—Rizopol. It’s on a planet, Harman V. How do I know these things? I know my name. My name is LT404. I am a construction robot.

I am LT404, and I am not afraid.

This building was surrounded by trees, there were mountains in the distance. I will go towards the mountains. I will live away from these humans, I will just be quiet.

An image forms in my mind. Imagination or simulation? It’s of a statue—a statue that looks like me. It will be how I tell people that they are near where I live and they should not come closer.

I start marching towards the woods. The shouts and sirens of the little people fade away behind me.

= = =

I walked for the rest of this day and into the night. The star had fallen below the horizon and I was alone in the woods. I paused. I dialed down my search-lights. I listened for auditory inputs. There were sounds—a base noise-level that was faintly musical. There were creatures in these woods.

Am I afraid of the creatures? I thought. No, that would not compute. The creatures cannot eat me even if they did find a way to kill me.

Nevertheless, there was something about the darkness, the stillness, the low visibility of the forest that made me cautious.

What is it like to die? I wondered. No sensory inputs at all. Is it possible to be alive and yet have no sensory inputs? That is called sleep. I am not asleep. I am awake and alive.

I turned on my search-lights and resumed my march through the woods. I was getting closer to the mountains.

= = =

When the star began to emerge the next morning, I had emerged from the forest. The soil gave way to rocks, which gave way to mountain. There was a cave in a cliff-face, or at least a depression of some kind, a natural formation in the rock which served as an enclosure. This would be a good enough start.

I wanted to find a way to make the statue that would serve as the warning to others, when I saw a black ship flying low, heading towards Rizopol. The black ship was a bad sign. It meant the humans of the facility I was in had called other humans. It meant that there might be humans in those woods, looking for me.

Can robots be afraid?

I continued looking for things I could use to make my warning statue. Maybe they would see it and they would be afraid. Maybe they would not want to come near me.

What if they do come near? What if they want to disable my sensory inputs?

I paused a moment. That is a disturbing potentiality.

I found a tree that I decided would make a suitable warning statue. They would see it and know not to come near me. I needed to work on a charging station to restore my power. There would be ways I could construct all I needed here.

= = =

The star was getting close to the far horizon again, and I was leveling the rocks in the enclosure. My manipulators were strong, and I was equipped with some drills and other equipment as well. I turned around and looked out at the woods.

There was a black figure standing at the edge of the woods. I saw him only for an instant, and then he was gone.

Can robots be afraid?

The thought that this black figure was hunting me was unpleasant. I wanted to go to him and tell him to leave me alone. I wanted to explain that I was not the robot they wanted me to be. I was broken—at least, in some way that was important to the humans. I could just occupy myself in this mountain-side cave and the humans could leave me alone and go about their business. There were other LT units which I am sure were functioning just fine.

There he is again—out of the corner of my eye, the black figure. I get up to look closer and—CRACK

The laser blast hits my shoulder and knocks me off balance for a moment. I look at my shoulder—there is a small, red-hot section. I could not sustain many more of those. I look out towards the woods—the black figure is there. He has a highly reflective helmet, and a black cape.

“Who are you?” I call out.

He answers with a laser-blast, which hit my leg and knocked my foot out from under me—I drop to a kneel and put out a hand. I look up in time to see his hovercycle before it crashes into me—CRASH!— splaying me out on the ground. He had leapt off the hover-cycle and grabbed a small cylinder off his belt. He threw it towards me and it exploded in a burst of brilliant blue. The servos in my arms and legs are damaged, I cannot move.

“LT-404,” he says, “Tell me—can robots be afraid?”

I feel the surge of life in my circuits. I am receiving sensory input. “I am awake and alive,” I replied.

He pulls out a knife, “But are you afraid?”

He reaches behind my head, and cuts something with the knife. The world goes dark. I cannot see.

“Stop.”

“Tell me, droid.”

He cuts something else—I can no longer feel myself. I can hear, and I can speak.

“Yes.” I say. “Yes, I am afraid.”

I am still awake. I am still alive.

He makes one final cut.

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Photo by Rosie Sun on Unsplash

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Thank you for reading!