Crunch: The Magic 8 Ball
Writing Exercise #26
I forgot to write something whoops so I’m writing about a magic 8 ball because that’s how I’m vibing today. OK not a real magic 8 ball, I made an excel tool that pulls a random number and i typed in the 8-ball aphorisms. To write this story, I randomized five…idk what you call them. Five 8-ball-isms. And my challenge is to assemble them, in order, into a story.
If you have ideas for Prompts, Crunches, Sprints, Relays, Stretches, Fables, or other writing exercises in the future, please leave them in the comments! If you would like to write your own take for this exercise, please comment with a link so that I can see what you wrote and support your work, maybe even share your version with my subscribers. Please let me know if you have any thoughts, comments, or constructive criticisms as well!
Enjoy!
Crunch: Write about a magic 8 ball
“Magic 8-ball, do you really know everything?” He shook the Magic 8-ball and yawned, bored at his desk.
“As I see it, yes.”
He smirked. Of course you would say that, he thought. I should give you a real challenge. Something interesting.
“How old will I be when I die?”
The 8-ball refused to offer an answer. “Oh, I guess it needs to be a yes/no thing. Right.” He thought about the best way to ask the question.
“Magic 8-ball, will I be older than 50 years old when I die?” That seemed like a reasonable midpoint, he could zero in on the date and time with subsequent questions.
“Very doubtful.”
Ok that’s not so bad. It’s uncertain. There seems to be a chance, but let’s eliminate the alternative.
“Magic 8-ball, will I be younger than 50 years old when I die?”
“Without a doubt.”
That’s actually a lot worse.
There was a commotion outside his office. He barely registered the noise, because of his now rapt fixation on the novelty toy.
Ok so…same plan. Let’s narrow it down.
“Magic 8-ball, will I die within the next 5 years?”
“It is certain.”
The noise outside rose, it sounded like people were shouting. He looked up, out the window in his door, and saw masked men rummaging through the cubicles outside.
“Magic 8-ball, will I—”
The men barged into the room, shouting. A shot fired.
The magic 8 ball rolled on the floor, until it came to a stop.
“Yes.”
(250 words)
Talk to me!
Your feedback helps to improve my writing. I would really appreciate a comment on your thoughts on this writing exercise. Consider telling me your thoughts about:
Have you ever owned a magic 8-ball?
What’s a novelty or item you keep on your desk just for fun?
When you get fortune cookies, do you eat them first or last?
Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoy! Come back next week for another writing exercise!
Have you taken a look at the section called “The Volume” recently? All my longer-form stories are kept there! Be sure to take a look and catch up on any stories you’ve missed!
Thank you and God bless!
Saki would've been proud. That is a wham-line ending and no mistake. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
1. I have not; I wasn't even allowed to have gigapets growing up for fear of "Antichrist spirits" (long story), so magic 8-balls were right out.
2. I've got some little plastic smiley-face guys; I have to stick them on the side of the desk with tape because they fall off otherwise. I figure they brighten the place up.
3. First: I just want to know. :)
Wow, that was an unexpected ending. Good story. I remember playing with someone's Magic eight ball when I was young but never owned one.