Crunch: The Memorial
Writing Exercise #34
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Enjoy!
Crunch: “All dressed up and nowhere to go”
Tears filled my eyes at the viewing for the famous atheist, Bertrand Bauer. He and I had our disagreements, but he was a valiant opponent, always pushing me to dig deep into theological, historical, or philosophical knowledge.
We took our seats before the open coffin of Bertrand. He was dressed in a fine suit, his body well preserved and looked almost to be naturally sleeping. His son stood and gave a eulogy that was moving and sincere.
The tears flowed freely while I listened—I had nothing but respect for this man. It was a shame to see him gone before his time.
After the eulogy, the crowd processed and each took a turn at the coffin of Bertrand. When my turn came, a mutual acquaintance noticed me. He came up to me afterward.
“Aren’t you the Catholic apologist, Terrence Towers?” he said.
I sniffed, dabbing my eyes with a handkerchief, “Yes. Yes I am.”
“Forgive me for being shocked to see you here. You and Bertrand feuded often and publicly. Your debates were like an intellectual clash of the titans!”
“Exactly. Out of respect for the man, the most formidable atheist and intellectual adversary, I have come to offer my condolences and honor his memory.”
“But Terrence, you’re crying more than his widow!”
“I know, I know. I can’t help it. Just look at him.”
“Why? What do you mean?”
“He’s all dressed up, with nowhere to go.”
(240 words)
The Promptee Has Become The Promptor
Your feedback helps to improve my writing. I would really appreciate a comment on your thoughts on this writing exercise. Consider telling me your thoughts about:
Have you ever been to a funeral for someone who wasn’t family?
This story is a bad joke just stretched out to 240 words. What’s your favorite bad joke?
What is your go to meal to bring to pot-luck events?
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My favorite bad joke is this one about these three guys and a firing squad. These guys have all been sentenced to die by firing squad, see, so they line the first guy up, get him ready to go, and the guy yells, "Tornado!" Everyone runs for cover, and the guy takes the opportunity to make his escape.
They realize there's no tornado, so they bring out the second guy, line him up, get ready to go, and the second guy yells, "Earthquake!" Everyone goes for shelter and the second guy gets away.
The third guy sees all this and he figures to himself, "Okay, I've got this, I see what's going down."
So they realize there's no earthquake and they line up the third guy.
The squad readies to go, the commander yells "Ready, aim,"
The third guy yells, "Fire!"
Did you hear about the new law passed in Hawaii? They were having too many loud parties and the cops kept on getting calls to shut them down. So they passed a law saying that you can only laugh at a certain decibal as to not disturb your neighbours...
Yeah, it's weird huh? Now they can only laugh a low ha.